When two people meet for the first time, there’s an opening exchange of pleasantries that sets the stage for a social interaction.
It seems entirely intuitive to apply the same idea in business, when meeting a potential new client for the first time.
They tell you a bit about themselves.
You tell them a bit about yourself.
Then you proceed on that initial fleeting sense of connection, in the hope it deepens over the course of your extended sales process.
Although this sense of connection might be enough for two individuals to agree to a casual social interaction, is it enough for them to make a decision to hire you?
Does a business decision necessarily flow out of a social interaction on its own?
The long sales cycle and relatively low conversion rate among most advisors in comparison to other professionals, such as doctors or lawyers, suggests it doesn’t.
Yet most advisors operate on the basis that it does.
With this relationship-building approach, when your prospect “ghosts” you, after you have invested your time, energy and expertise, it can be a personally rejecting experience.
Your openness, cordiality, and generosity can often feel like a “slap in the face” when they break the so-called relationship you have invested in.
The reason for this disconnect has little to do with your relationship building skills.
Rather, it’s the unmet expectations of your prospect caused by advisors confusion about the nature of the interaction itself.
In short, your prospect isn’t looking for a relationship, they’re looking for someone to solve their problem.
As a result, trying to build a relationship pre-sale, invites the two-pronged consequence of having them doubt your motives and then reject your plan.
In a social transaction, the object of the exchange is mutual cordiality.
In a business transaction, the object of the exchange is money in return for a result, which one party needs but can’t bring about for themselves because they don’t have the knowledge and expertise.
For the business transaction to take place, two requirements must first be confirmed by each party.
One party (you) need to confirm that the other is willing to commit to trusting you.
The other (your prospect) needs to confirm they will commit to working with you, as long as you hold up your end of the bargain and deliver the result they need.
Here’s the catch…
They don’t know what that result is, what it looks like, how it can be achieved, until after they are a paid client, rather than before.
Hence your personality and your solution, everything that you define as “your value” and offer as proof, can be perceived as black box from their position.
In a sense, your “value” has no value pre-sale — there’s a trust divide preventing them from feeling you “get them” at a deep level.
The only way to make that happen, is to step out of your personality/value/solution-based approach is to shift to a problem-centric, trust-based approach.
Trust is built on empathy — your empathy in this context is measured by the degree of focus you’re able to deliver through a deep-dive of your prospect’s issues.
To learn more about this trust-based approach to selling, order your complimentary book and consultation below.